“Godamnit!" She punched me in the chest, this time she wasn't so easy about it.

“Easy tiger," Ed chimed in.

“The poor guy's got self-esteem issues up the wazoo. In no circumstances could his perfect Jenny ever end up with him. Oh, and he was willing to suffer in the accursed friend-zone forever just to make you happy you know."

I was going to need a fucking huge pile of sand.

Ed's words did seem to smother Jenny's anger however. She lifted herself onto her tiptoes and placed a kiss on my cheek, then one on my lips for good measure.

"Yeah, I'm stupid." I admitted.

“Too right, you are. She's nowhere near perfect!" Ed interrupted. "Her nose goes up at the end, her eyebrows are too thin, and she constantly looks confused. Though, that Last one might just be because she's blonde.”

“Wow, someone really wants a kick in the nuts.” Jenny was looking at him with hot knives in her eyes.

"Ok, ok. My fun's over. Are you two going to this Halloween thing?" Ed took on a slightly more serious tone.

“I dunno, first I've heard of it. If there's beer, then sure." I looked to Jenny for her agreement, she grinned back at me and we both nodded our acceptance.

“Awesome. Thought about your costumes? I vote Jenny goes as a slutty nurse." He held up his hand.

I raised mine into the air along with it.

“Seconded.”

“Hey!" Jenny jabbed me in the ribs with her elbow.

“You're supposed to be on my side."

“But... but... slutty nurse!" I pleaded.

Jenny was trying her damnedest not to Laugh at my plight.

“Only if you dress up as a shirtless fireman." She countered.

“Well, there's an image that will prevent me from ever masturbating again. Thanks, Jen." Ed grumbled.

“How about we buy those costumes beforehand and for the party we dress up as Dracula and his bride?" I suggested.