I arched an eyebrow as her voice trailed off.

“Okay, I'm really not competitive about it. It's not about topping Sam.

But I might be a little greedy. I'm your girlfriend now. Don't I get to be greedy about stuff like being your first anal? Your first minivan sex?"

I chuckled and kissed her again. "Sure. We'll just have to think up more firsts."

“You're on." She gave me another quick peck, stared at me for a long moment with an expression of utter adoration, and then gave me another fierce kiss. This time, when we finally separated, I let her walk out the door.

But I was still sad to see her go. If it were up to me, she'd never leave my side. People in movies always ask, “How do I know if it's love?" The answer is always, “When you feel it, you'll know."

I felt it. For the first time in my life, I really FELT it. I mean, I'd been infatuated with Naimh before. I'd wanted to fuck her since the day

I met her, and I'd often lain in bed jerking off to fantasies about her. But I'd never felt this all-consuming need to BE with her before.

I'd never felt this kind of heartache at anyone's absence before. Not even Belle.

I'd said I loved girls before.

I'd said “I love you" or variations thereof to girls before.

I'd even told girls I was “in love" with them before.

But I'd never had THIS kind of feeling, and I suddenly realized I must've been lying to everyone I'd ever said those words to before. It wasn't a good feeling, and I tried to make myself feel better by telling myself I hadn't actually lied to anyone; I just didn't know what I was talking about. I didn't know what “true love" really meant.

I felt it now.

I felt it for her.

And yet... I now had to get dressed and drive out to go on a date with someone else. And that felt... weird.

But I'd chosen this life. I'd chosen to dedicate myself to the BTC, and

I wouldn't let any of them down. Zofi needed me tonight, and I was going to do the best I could to support her. Was it really so bad that

I was in love with Naimh and yet going on a date with Zofi? Was it really so bad I was about to go pretend to be another girl's boyfriend when I actually belonged to someone else?

Not really. For one thing, Naimh had been clear about her devotion to sharing me with her friends. For another, it wasn't even about Naimh's relationship with Zofi. It was about MY relationship with Zofi. Now perhaps she and I had never felt romantic feelings for each other, and if I ever DID rank the girls (which I swore to Sam I never did), I would have to admit I was the “least close" to Zofi in comparison to the rest. But being ranked sixth out of a bazillion women in the world was nothing to sneeze at. Zofi was still very special to me, and I was doing this as a friend for her. Our relationship deserved that much.

One thing that might have been a challenge though, was Zofi's request to me. Even though we were truly “just friends", despite however much messing around we did with each other, tonight's double-date was really important to her. This was her big chance to prove to her parents that she wasn't gay, and to do that, she needed me to really “sell” that we were in love.

“Can you do that?" she'd asked me just last night when the whole BTC was at my house.

“Can you pretend to be in Love with me?"

Last night, I'd promised I'd do my best. Tonight? I found myself a little conflicted. How could I possibly pretend to be in love with a girl OTHER than the girl I was in Love with?

"Pretend she's Naimh,' I told myself. ‘Take whatever feelings you're feeling right now, and just... feel them for Zofi. All the heartache, all the longing, all the angst that Naimh's not around: dredge up the pain at not being with her right now and let it feed your relief to have Zofi by your side instead. Take all your desire to bend the busty redhead over at the waist, spank her cheeks, and ram your dick up her slutty asshole, and then imagine the busty brunette's gonna let you do it to her as a reward at the end of the night.‘