“I'm welcome to kick you all out of my house,” Holly retorted.

Sam just gave her a look. Holly pursed her lips and glanced over everyone else. Zofi was quick to grab a dining table chair and park it next to Sam. Alice nodded and walked over to me, extending her hand for a fist bump before dropping onto the cushion next to me. Belle, then

Mari, and then Naimh followed suit. And finally, with a sigh, Holly grabbed a dining table chair and came to join the circle.

And then we worked things out.

The fight itself last night had lasted less than ten minutes, but the group discussion to resolve it took a Little bit longer. Sam got us started by apologizing once again for mounting herself on me what felt like eons ago. Naimh admitted that she'd never really gotten over Sam getting to me first.

“I forgave you at the time, and I meant it," Naimh stated solemnly.

“But there's a selfish part inside me that had always wanted to be

Matty's first -- to be his special one. I tried to convince myself it wasn't a big deal. But I guess it still niggles me, and I'm not completely sure I'LL ever fully get over it.”

"I understand," Sam said tightly, Looking sad.

"I want to believe you didn't do it just to beat me out."

"I didn't. I would've been perfectly happy for you to have been his first."

“You sure?" Naimh raised her eyebrows.

“We all know how competitive you are -- how important it is for you to be number one."

"To be honest, I always thought Belle was going to beat you to him, and

I'd made my peace with that. Getting his cherry..." Sam took a deep breath and sighed. "The really shitty thing about that is: I wasn't thinking about you or Belle or even Matty. Being Matty'’s first was never a goal of mine. When it happened, I was only thinking of myself.

It was a horrible thing to do to someone, but I took his virginity just so I could selfishly not feel like a failure.”

Sam pursed her lips and exhaled slowly, closing her eyes while shaking her head.

"I took away something precious to both of you for nothing. I know how much that hurt not only you, but everyone else. It changed EVERYTHING, and while I'd like to think things turned out alright in the end -- especially for Matty -- if I had the chance to do it all over again, I wouldn't have done it like that. I don't regret having sex with Matty, but I do still regret the manner and the timing in which it happened."

I looked around, and the other girls were nodding their agreement.

Sam finished, saying, “Please believe I never meant to hurt you or anyone else."

“I believe you," Naimh confirmed.

“That means a lot. And as for the competition that followed: I'LL admit, being able to say I was his first titfuck or his first shower sex or his first overnight gave me little thrills, just like I'm sure being his first anal or his first minivan sex gave you thrills. I'd like to think that at first, it was all in good fun, a little healthy competition that you enjoyed, didn't you?"

"I did."

“Thing is: I realized I wasn't being competitive for the right reasons.

After my whole anal deflowering went painfully wrong, I realized I wasn't being competitive in good fun; I was being competitive for that same selfish drive to not feel like a failure."