“Got it." I smiled and squeezed his hand.

“Tough love." “That's the name of the first movie I directed." He laughed.

“BDSM, ugh." “We live some kind of life, don't we?"

“Some of us don't know any better." He turned serious, “I'm one of them, don't be me Molly, you left once for family, do it again."

“I'll think on it, really."

“Good and fair warning. When you talk to Malcolm I bet he's going to bring up that mother stuff like I did except he'll be more serious so try not to get defensive with him."

"I won't."

"I'm fairly sure he knows you have a son, you know. Malcolm digs where he shouldn't sometimes. But he's tight lipped; he just likes knowing dirty little secrets

“Paul isn't a dirty secret; I just don't need these people knowing about him."

“Because of what you just shot." He said pointedly, "And no, he is not a dirty secret, but this shit is for you. Just keep your cool if Malcolm goes off on his all moms and sons deep down want each other."

“I don't want my son." I said softly as he walked away with a quick wave over his shoulder.

But then why did I see him at the end, taking Brian's place in my mind? And worse, why hadn't the image bothered me at the time?

“Come in." I said to the knock on the dressing room door.

Josh had caught up with me to say Malcolm needed to make a couple of Phone calls, but to please stick around so he could talk to me, so it was a surprise to see Brian enter instead.

“Hi Molly." He gave me a nervous smile, “I have to leave for the airport in a little while, but do you have a minute?"

“Sure. I gestured at the small chair in the corner, but he came over to stand in front of me instead,

“That's okay, I'll be quick, I just wanted to say thank you again." “You don't have to thank me." I told him, “Hey, it's my job after all.” I laughed, trying to keep it light.

“No, your job was to pretty much fuck me, that's not what you did. You were patient and nice and you really made me feel good and I don't just mean, well, you know." He blushed.

“God, you're cute. After everything we just did you're still being all shy."

“I surprised myself." He laughed.

“But seriously, thank you. That really helped. I really saw you as my mom for awhile and I think I can deal with my feelings a little better now."

“I'm glad." I nodded, "You're a really good kid, Brian. I bet your mom is proud of you."

“She is, but only because she doesn't know I'd want to do this to her." He said quietly.

"So why don't you tell her?" I couldn't help asking, “Wouldn't it be better to get it out in the open?"

“and then what?" He grunted, “Best case she sends me to therapy. Worse, she kicks me out." He paused, “No, she tells my father and he kicks my ass then throws me out."