I'd started reading and frowned; almost every one of them was a variation of how loving the final minutes were, how hot it was to watch ‘her son‘ make love to her and how obviously real my cumming was.

The more I read the more disturbed I became, sentences jumping out at me as I scanned, “You can tell she really cared about her son in this" “That look of love was so sweet!" “That last part was the most romantic mom/son action I have ever seen, I was horny and emotional!"

There were countless I wish my mom would love me like that remarks and I noticed my website friend ‘sowantmymom' had commented claiming after watching this he not only felt closer to his mom than ever, but he felt ‘it was going to happen soon' between them.

I'd sat there with the same sense of misgiving that had been plaguing me in the recent weeks. It was only a job. I was an actress and simply better than most. That's all it was, but all of this kept making me come back to why the hell was I so good at these? That and where had that come from with Brian.

Dan had been right, intense was the word for that scene and he had no idea how emotional I'd really gotten. Maybe it was time to try to meet someone, but that would cause more issues with my career and what if the emotions with Brian were maternal? Was I lying to myself? Did I have the misplaced affection for Paul that Malcolm claimed many mothers and sons had for each other?

Knowing it would be another mistake, but doing it anyway, I clicked on the video itself. I hadn't watched myself in action since I'd seen one of my old videos show up on a website and couldn't resist watching the original Molly Minx for a few minutes.

I'd sworn I would never look at anything I was doing at this point as at least back then I wasn't lying to anyone I cared about and felt no shame in my actions. But after all the comments I wanted to see for myself what everyone else seemed to see.

I fast forwarded through the opening, paused briefly on Brian and I kissing, then continued to move the bar forward. I took in a minute of my sucking on him, then him going down on me. I watched myself ride him, noting that I did look pretty convincing as I posed for the camera, naked lust on my face.

Brian taking me doggy was next, then the position Malcolm had wanted us to end in, with us on our sides. I tensed as Brian rolled me over on the screen and began making love to me. For the next few minutes I sat there, my eyes glued, not to any of the action, or our bodies, but my face.

Near the end, my eyes were closed, lips parted, I was moaning softly and holding Brian tightly to me. When I came, it was easy to see how real it was. What else was disturbingly real was the emotion on my face.

I was looking at Brian with nothing short of adoration on my face. I looked like a goddamn love sick girl. I recalled that was about the time I'd had the image of Paul in my mind. I sat there stunned as I watched the finish, Brian moaning and cumming inside me, me urging him to and caressing him and purring as he filled me.

I clicked off the video and backing away from the lap top as if it had bit me, I'd gone upstairs and showered for work, trying to clean the shame from me as I always did after a movie.

But this shame was deeper, it wasn't the shame of filming the scene it was the shame that after watching it, I could never blame anyone for wondering if there was something to my ability for these movies.

I dressed in the black thigh highs and short black skirt and slipping a sleeveless t-shirt on, buttoned the white blouse over it, leaving the top two undone to show a little cleavage to work some extra tips.

Some women joked at work about how pathetic it was we did that and as I agreed I would wonder what they would think if they knew my tits, and the rest of me, were masturbation fodder for countless men.

Paul had been due home to change for his shift at Barnes and Noble and normally I'd have made sure to be there to see him for a few minutes before I left, but today I headed out and got to work early. I felt terrible doing it, but I couldn't face him at the moment.

Work was slow which wasn't good for my mental state. Leaning against the bar, waiting for people to come in or get someone a new drink all I could see was my face when Brian was cumming. I'd have had an easier time watching myself take multiple loads to the face and pretend to like it.

By the time my shift was over, I was no more ready to go home and eventually see Paul as I was earlier and decided to settle my mood the old fashioned way, get drunk. I was doing a pretty good job of it at the moment and was taking the first sip of the fresh drink Marv put in front of me when a guy in a dark suit sat next to me.

“Hey, He said in a friendly tone, "How you doing tonight?"

“Doing just fine." I gave him a drunken smile and hoisted my drink to him. He laughed and tapping his beer to my glass took a couple of swallows.

“I'm Dave." He offered his hand which I took.

“Mary. And not interested, although maybe I should be.

“So, Mary, I've been sitting over there watching you for a little while."

“Should I be worried?" I asked, "You a stalker?" I winked to tell him it was a joke and he laughed it off.

He was decent looking guy, dark hair and eyes, rugged features and the expensive suit flattered his shoulders nicely. As my eyes roamed over him, I noticed he was doing the same, lingering first on my legs in their fuck me heels, then resting briefly on my chest before coming back to my face.