Tarloh shook his mighty head. "No. But it will help the Strays get back on their feet. It will still give me eight hours a day to patrol, as well as on my days off."

Shield looked down on the woman who had saved so many of their asses so many times. "Is it so bad? Is wanting to remember what being normal is like so bad?"

It was Anya's turn to speak. "Say the word and I'll quit," the beautiful Latina said. “If you really feel that we're abandoning you like Natasha did . . ." Anya didn't believe that Nat had actually abandoned Red. She was just trying to provoke a reaction.

"Nat didn't . . . " Red started. "This isn't about her."

"What's it about?" Jane asked. It wouldn't take a genius to realize that she was terrified. Red hurting meant that she was hurting. “Why did you do it?"

A little bit of Red's sanity returned. She hadn't even thought about how her actions would affect this young woman. “I did it because... because it's the only thing I know how to do." She looked at Tarloh.

He had been her friend since before she had been turned. “I'm sorry," she said. "I just don't know any other way to be."

Tarloh was confused. "What do you mean?"

"I can't be normal," she said. "I train the new people. I get the supplies, and I fight our enemies. I can't fight an Elder God. You all are buying our supplies now, and we don't have any new people.

I don't know if we ever will again." She sighed. "I can't handle .

I don't know how to be obsolete."

The cave was silent as all eyes were locked on Red. Tarloh was the first to speak. The big man shook his head and sat down on the bed next to his friend. He took her hands in his and said "ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR FUCKING MIND?!" at the top of his voice.

Red's hangover erupted with all the bells and whistles of a train station. She actually had to clutch the sides of her head to make sure it didn't fall off.

Tarloh had a slightly wild look in his eyes. "I mean . . . good grief! When are you going to get it through that thick head of yours that we're NOT GIVING UP! You've been bound and determined to take on the entire world all by yourself since you were fifteen years old!

You don't have to do that! Have you forgotten how things work? I cheer people up, make unreasonable promises to all of them and expect YOU to make it happen somehow. And it's worked for a long time!

Maybe we NEED to get jobs because we're not going to be able to steal everything we need! Jane showed us that. Maybe we've got to learn to live another way! You think that I'M going to figure out how that's going to work? You think that I, or any of the other Strays for that matter, are going to be able to get new members up to speed . . . and yes, I'm expecting our ranks to grow back Like they always have. No! I expect YOU to do it. You said it yourself!

We have to do more with less."

“My... head," Red groaned through immense pain.

“I don't give a crap," Tarloh grumbled. “As soon as you get done feeling sorry for yourself and can walk a straight line, get your ass down to the main building. We've got to figure out how we're going to handle things when the others get back with that fucking jewel." Tarloh promptly stood up and wandered off.

Talia was grinning. She knew she shouldn't be. Red had been seriously beat up and wasn't in the best frame of mind at the moment. But still Most of the other Strays were trying really hard not to Laugh.

"Red, you REALLY thought that we didn't need you anymore?" Anya said with a chuckle. She leaned in and kissed the woman on her aching forehead. She and Croc left, followed by the rest of the Strays except Jane and Talia.

Red wasn't sure what was worse . . . the pain or the embarrassment.

"I guess I made an ass out of myself?"

“Just a bit," Talia said. “I guess I can't blame you though. If I'd been through half of what you have and had to deal with everything people expect you to, I'd have had a breakdown too."