Damien, Bane, Evan, and Kein disagreed. They could control my body and my reactions. This foolish belief I had would be dispelled soon.

"Much like other strange beliefs you hold,” Evan said finishing throwing things up on the transport.

“We must train you not to have these thoughts."

I tried to argue with them as we set out. No one believed me. They thought I had developed a delusion in reaction to stress.

“We fear for you," Christof said carefully. "If you continue to think these foolish things you may anger Nu-reeh. You have already paid for your prior mistakes. We do not wish you to continue to earn punishment."

My brows crinkled as I looked up at him.

“What punishment?"

The men were silent for a moment before they answered. It was Damien who finally spoke.

“Nu-reeh did not wish to harm your flesh so close to your breeding cycle," he said.

“Your refusal to willingly submit to her demands angered her. You were punished these Last five days.”

Unless they'd used vast amounts of calming cream and healing cream, I didn't remember any punishment. We'd had sex and spent time with one another. None of that had seemed designed to harm me.

"You are accustomed to punishment that is given," Bane informed me.

“Punishment can also be denial of things you would enjoy.”

That made less sense. The men were very generous during sex and I always enjoyed it. They'd ensured I had maximal pleasure every time.

“Had you behaved," Christof said, “Hannah would have been permitted to visit every day. You defied Nu-reeh and in response she kept your offspring from you."

I had to stifle the cry with my hand. Turning around abruptly I looked into the hills we were leaving.

“If you continue to act as you should, Nu-reeh will allow Hannah to visit with you," Damien calmly informed me.

It was a crushing blow. If I'd just done what I was supposed to I would have spent time with Hannah. This was a terrible loss.

“Does she know?" I asked softly watching the mountains get smaller behind us.

The men had no idea what Nu-reeh had told Hannah. They weren't even sure she'd been told anything. My daughter may or may not have been aware I was near the mountains. It was unlikely Nu-reeh had discussed my death wish with her, that would be pointless.

The ride back to the compound seemed to take forever. I couldn't believe I hadn't thought about Hannah when I was so close to the mountains. Honestly, I had been kept too busy. I suspected that had been intentional.

I made up my mind to be good, I would have to be. It was the only way I would be allowed to see my daughter. Nu-reeh had been accurate in pegging my weakness. I would do anything to spend time with my Hannah.